now i know, sometimes we have to give up certain things in order to gain something

now, i've to give up my japanese course, which i think it doesn't really apply much in my life. maybe it is, but i'll probably learn it in a later time but not now. B'cause i met some difficulties.
" it's never too old to learn something "

think twice, i'm not someone who get to spoon-fed by parents, i've to live for myself. it's a good way to be independent. (: but well, i do envious people who always rely on parents. b'cause they can get whatever they want easily just by opening their mouth and get it from them, but i've my own way of thinking. i get things i want using my own strength, using my hard earn money, my blood and sweat money.whichever i think it's useless / meaningless to me, i'll have to give up. b'cause i'm not THAT rich. to me, obviously i feel guilty of taking money from parents.but sometimes i did, if i've really no choice.


that's the reason why i don't want to quit my job. and obviously i can't deny the fact that my family is facing some financial difficulties. and i've to work to hold on this family as well. but of course, not only i'm the one, every of my family members. (:

uh hur, my time is really packed once school opens. i've to work, study, cca i guess. if i've to slot in a japanese course. i guess i will freak out sooner or later. i don't want to tire myself out. 24hrs a day, how many hours i spend to sleep ? sometimes i just realised there's people out there really don't understand my situation. but well, i myself understand will do. who cares 'bout them.

cheers man. eat some sweet HAHA :D

will you be back ? how can i know?

adidas or nike ?

japanese course and school fees ?

laptop ?

laptop bag ?

clothes?

cosmetics ?

transportation & feeding stomach fess ?

dental ?

savings ?

WoAH, stress seh. how am i going to survive this month with my stupid bloody pay like only $700 .

and there're 30 fucking days in april ?

should i eat grass or should i just bang the wall and die ?!

i don't give a fucking damn to it!
i just simply cant be bother.

fuck, i don't care what kind of fucking attitude you have
but i just want to let you know i'm not your fucking punching bag which you always show your fucking attitude on, and i'm not the one who you always vent your anger or fucking frustration on.
i'm your Friend! i had enough of giving in to you, don't you realise that ?
i'm sick and tired, if you weren't my long years friend, would you think i'll give a fucking damn?
can't you simply put yourself in other people shoes, when the time i needed people to show some fucking concern the most, you showed me this kind of fucking attitude. how would i feel?
simply i can only say i felt so much helpless, don't you think i will feel sad 'bout it.
i wanted to do something, but what can i say? and instead what can i do?
surely, you will say there's nothing big 'bout it, maybe i'm the one who is over-sensitive?
but what do you think if i showed you all this fucking attitude? don't tell me you don't feel anything 'bout it and you feel that it's alright.
nah, don't you realise everything i give in to you, and i'm the one who always let you do the things so long as you are happy? why?! am i that fucking stupid!?! ITS BECAUSE I CARE, I MIND, AND the most importantly I SEE YOU AS MY BEST FRIEND. i felt really upset to see you showing me this kind of bloody attitude , and it's only to me. i'd already have enough and it's like tonnes of problems for me to solve and handle, can't you simply show a lil' care instead of giving me this kind of attitude,? hey friend, i'm seriously very tired already. )):

PS : mind me for saying all the fucks...

WAH! FUCKED UP LA. I DON'T KNOW I'VE TO ASK RIGHT! WHY NEED TO BE SO WORKED UP!
DAMN it!!
so stucked up la. damn
what's wrong la....
@!#$%^%$#@!&^*&*!!
rarr
why recently ALL my surrounding people get so worked up SO EASILY?
just simply ask a fucking question, need to be so agitated meh. Zz
i don't care all these fucking thing la, just can't be bothered la.
up to everyone la. so STUCKEd up..
you've your character, i've my attitude..
damn fucking sian already la.
i'm down with my luck again.
i shall have to go down to temple to pray and bathe with flower water.
@!#$&*^%$#@#!@*@@#!$#@%^!!!!!!

你还会想知道我想说的吗？

该忘了你对不对，怕自己无法面对。

我想要说， 可是你还会听吗？

我不想把你忘掉，我想把你放在我的记忆里。

你会回来找我吗？

。。。。

HELLO BABY

[x] You know someone that cares aboutyou.
[ ] You have a girlfriend/boyfriend/fiancee/ husband/ wife.
[ x] You have your own room
[x] You own a cell phone.
[x] You have an ipod/ mp3 player.
[ x] Your parents are still married.
[x ] You have more than 2 bestfriends.
T O T A L: 6
[x] You dress how you want to.
[x] You hang out with friends morethan once a week. ( hard to say)
[x]There is a computer and laptop inyour house.
[x] You have never been beaten up.
[x] You never cry more than twice amonth.
[x] You are allowed to listen to the music you want to.
[x] Your room is big enough for you. (just nice)
[ ] People don't use you for somethingyou have.
[ ] You have been to a concert.
[x] You laugh more than twice a day.
T O T A L: 8
[x] You have over 50 friends onFriendster.
[ ] You have pictures on myspace. ( i don't have myspace)
[x]Your parents let you have aFriendster ('cause they don't even know what's friendster)
[x] You have no problem in yourstudies.( not studying currently)
[ ] You collect something normal. ( what you mean by normal)
[x] People don't make fun of you tobe mean.
[x] You look forward to going toschool.(of course! poly eh. who don't?)
[x] You don't wish you were someoneelse.
[x] You do something after school athome/outside.(what thing ?)
[ ] You always pass ALL the subjectsin exams.(i'm not that clever)
T O T A L: 7
[ ] Your family owns a car (does lorry counts?)
[x] You usually don't fight with yourparents.
[ ] You are happy with yourappearance/looks.(nah. not really)
[ ] You aren't self-conscious at all.
[x] You have friends.(of course, who don't)
[x] Your parents working salary monthlyis more than $2000.
[x] You know your parents careand love you.
T O T A L: 4
[x ] You know what is going on in theworld.
[x] You care about so many people.
[ x] You are happy with your life.
[ x] You usually aren't sick.
[x] You know more than one language.
[x] You have a screen name.
[x] You've gotten awards/ prizes/trophies before.
[] You know the words to more than 5songs.(i don't get it )
[x] You dont have any enemies at all.
[x] You are happy that you're living.
T O T A L: 9
Now count the number and multiply by 2.

i'm happy with my life up to - 68% ( that's not too bad either)

Singapore Polytechnic - Civil & Structuring Engineering

orientation week - 9th april to 13 april.

ohwell. i'm tired . very tired i can say. hmmm let's see. 2 days ago, it was fiona's birthday. so i rushed over to meet the girls after my work. what i can say in the restuarant was that the atmosphere was XTREMELY weird! no word to express. i was like "wah lao, entertaining myself" and "cracking Lame jokes" which noone understands and laugh as well. Zz. but aiya we felt so pathetic. like 7 girls were sharing 3 plates of food. kinda dots... then the guys were like a plate each.. HAHA! but after that, woo-hoo our feeling is back. we went K. ah ha, we sang to 1pm. and all of us went bonkers. HAHAHA. it was like so COOL and OBVIOUSLY FUN & HIGH! hahaa after that i cab-ed home with jingwen & tiffany!
the next day was like dots, morning shift.... after my boring & cold morning at work. i spent the rest of the day with my dear jingwen. we went to ang moh kio levi's boutique. woah, their boutique is nice i can say. the sweet color they have. XD ! okay , went there to collect my payslip and whatever it is. we went to TANGS to collect my PRETTY NICE 501 lemon shirt! heha! went to isetan wisma promo to get my pathetic jeans but i'm so sorry, i didn't get to purchase anything well, i didn't really see anything which i really like. ): so went to cityhall - new urban male.. oh my goodness sake, their sandals are tempting me and everything!
we decided to shop at new urban male at the end of the month ! blah shit

aiya i'm tired la. i'm turning in soon. .. shall update la. (: